Leadership and Growth Lessons from the Four Agreements

 Leadership & Growth: Lessons from The Four Agreements

Long before I stepped into leadership roles, a friend loaned me a book that would profoundly shape how I saw myself and how I moved through the world. The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz isn’t just a book; it’s a guide to living with clarity, self-mastery, and personal freedom.

At the time, I wasn’t yet a formal leader, but one of the agreements—”Don’t take things personally”—transformed the way I viewed myself and my interactions. And as I stepped into leadership, it became one of my most valuable lessons.

The Leadership Lesson: Feedback is Not Personal

One of the hardest yet most necessary growth points in leadership is learning to receive feedback without taking it as a personal attack. Early in my leadership journey, I realized that when I took feedback personally, I became defensive, closed off, and resistant to growth. But the moment I shifted my perspective—seeing feedback as a tool for learning rather than a reflection of my worth—I started to grow exponentially as a leader.

When we take feedback personally, we allow our emotions to override logic, making it difficult to improve. But when we detach our ego and see feedback as a gift, an opportunity for refinement, we create space for transformation, self-awareness, and better leadership.

Applying This in Leadership

As leaders, we will always face criticism, whether from peers, teams, or stakeholders. If we internalize every critique as an attack, we rob ourselves of the opportunity to elevate our leadership to the next level.

Constructive feedback fuels improvement—it sharpens decision-making and strengthens leadership presence.

Not everyone’s opinion defines you—but discernment allows us to extract valuable lessons from feedback.

A growth mindset leads to resilience—leaders who embrace feedback with openness become more adaptable and influential.


Your Turn

The moment I stopped taking feedback personally, I started to truly grow as a leader.

How do you handle feedback in leadership? Have you ever struggled with taking it personally? I’d love to hear your insights!